About 11 years ago, I went through a major body change. I started running, was taking that new (at the time) diet drug Xenical, watched what I ate and I lost 90 pounds, from 245 to 155. At the time, it was like losing the weight of my oldest daughter off my back! Unfortunately, I broke my shoulder playing softball at that point and ended up sitting on the couch when I wasn't working for the next 6 months because even walking hurt my shoulder. At this point, I also got a teaching job that required me to work late most nights and made me tired the other nights, so little by little, I gained back weight. At my peak I was running 5-6 miles a day (from my house around the trails and back again) and felt extremely strong. Sadly, I never reached my goal of 150 pounds.
Fortunately, after about 5 years of gaining weight back, I was able to run again (a little, but never like before) and with programs like P90X I was able to slow the weight gain and maintain a somewhat OK, though too much for my liking, weight.
Then, throw in another major change in my life a little over two years ago, and it seems the weight has just taken on a mind of it's own. I have that old familiar back pain, shortness of breath, sweating profusely and all the nasty stuff that comes along with being way overweight. Yuck.
Why am I sharing this?
I'm tired of being miserable. I'm tired of feeling tired and sore. I'm tired of looking at this unfamiliar figure in the mirror, so I've decided that I'm going to take control of my body again. Sadly, I'm 11 years older, and time is running out for me to get out there and go again, and it's going to be tough.
So here we go. My daughters are older now and they're going to help me, and hopefully, with their support, I'm going to begin a major course in weight loss/fitness. I have a month before school starts, and my first goal is to lose 10 pounds. I know, much more than is considered really healthy for a month. But, this is desperation time. I'm starting two programs back up - the P90X program and the 6 Week Body Makeover plan. The P90X will reshape my body and help me build that muscle needed, and using the diet/eating plan from the 6 Week Body Makeover should help the calorie intake and get me eating correctly. I also plan to walk/run when I can as well just for that added body boost.
I've used both programs separately with success before, so if all goes well, this 45-year old man should be in the best shape of his life within a couple of years. And if not, well, I do know I'll have lost a little bit of weight.
Anyway, give me some support when you see me and help cheer me along to my previous weight. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a step, right?
Small steps, baby steps.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Friday, July 15, 2011
Must be the weather...
Ok, I've decided that the bad mood and horrible days I've had lately are due to the weather. It's soooo hot and dry here. I saw a picture yesterday that said, "Satan called. He wants his weather back!" I did laugh at that one, but I do believe that he's actually starting to send his crop to Oklahoma because it's more miserable here now than there! Hahaha!
However, when I read this today, I felt the blood begin to boil and felt a blog post coming on. I only HOPE that with this issue, it's just the weather!
Lately, I've been reading about the budget cuts being made, and all the programs being dropped just so states and the nation can do whatever it is that they need to. And while this is normal stuff and just part of an otherwise normal process, the American people are starting to notice.
A few weeks ago, it became clear that our State Superintendent, the woman in charge of all of education in Oklahoma, the one with the dental degree and not the highly qualified teaching degree the rest of us HAVE to have just to teach in the U.S., yet the state education Czar has no need for such a bothersome thing, decided to cut the stipends paid to nationally certified teachers. (see article here - http://okea.org/about-oea/media-center/state-department-delivers-fatal-blow-to-teacher-incentive-program.) The money that was promised to them and an actual effort to keep this state's teachers in Oklahoma and not go to Texas or Kansas where they actually pay their teachers, so long as they had it available (which they do have available, she just decided to use it elsewhere.) The worst thing about this is that she was the deciding vote - the tie breaker - in this decision. OUR OKLAHOMA EDUCATION LEADER decided to spit on those teachers who took the time to better themselves!
This was a big blow to those teachers because, despite being so good at their jobs, they need that money every bit as much as do the rest of us. They put in nearly 3 years of extremely difficult work and are now told, "So? Deal with it! We're in a budget crunch! Come on, make the sacrifice for your school and the children!" [insert slap in face here] Its great TEACHERS can sacrifice for children - we have for years and don't complain when doing so. How about someone else take a turn at sacrificing "for the children?" Like our State Superintendent and her staff, for starters? The National Board stipend was just a little recognition that these teachers duly deserve. They worked hard for it! (I'm in the middle of the process myself, though I'm questioning now if I should complete it. For some reason, it doesn't seem worth it now since I've gotten the educational benefit from it. Not for just 4 little letters after my name since there's no other benefit outside of personal growth anymore from it.)
Anyway, in a second strike, she got rid of funding for literacy programs that we teachers have used to help us reach the ridiculous goals these very same politicians/non educators have placed on us and our students. (Found here http://newsok.com/state-elementary-school-reading-program-unfunded-for-first-time-in-13-years/article/3585357#ixzz1S67LHQGb.) This is after all the hoopla she made when she first took office that made so many people want to impeach her, if that's even possible. All for a POSSIBLE savings of nearly 6 million dollars. Is that all? Seriously? Doesn't seem worth it in the big picture.
Now, today, I read that Obama has said that if Congress doesn't vote to allow the debt ceiling to be raised, he's can't guarantee that Social Security checks will be able to go out to the American People. (Found here http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/07/12/obama-social-security-checks-debt-ceiling_n_895831.html.)Seriously? The very people that put him and the legislators in office are being told they won't get paid? These people NEED their checks! Where is the legislator threat of not getting paid? These AMERICAN citizens don't get to live in a tax funded white house with security fences and have a cook making them and their families meals for them. They don't have chauffeurs, and actually have to pay the high cost for gasoline in the car they hope will make it through the day. They don't get the option of not worrying about their utility bills and if they paid them correctly this month. They have doctors bills to pay because they use the doctor and go to the hospital MORE than those in office. They don't have a salary greater than $250,000.00 a year, then $150,000.00 for the rest of their lives AFTER they leave office. Yet, the one person in the nation that gets all of this is telling them that their very lives are in danger because they can't find the money (outside of their own paychecks, that is).
People, we have to wake up! We HAVE to put a stop to the harassment our own, voted for, politicians are doing to us. We HAVE to stop being held for ransom!
Ok, now you're saying I'm being sensationalist. Maybe, but let's take a look at Oklahoma for now. Let's see. Teachers in Oklahoma have one of the LOWEST salaries for teachers in America. Like the bottom 5 is what I remember (I may be wrong, but I'm close.) It's documented, it's valid and everyone knows this. Yet, according to a news article (Found here http://www.newson6.com/story/15081983/tonight-at-10-oklahoma-lawmakers-among-best-paid-in-nation) I read yesterday, our legislators and leaders in this state have one of the HIGHEST salaries in America - somewhere in the TOP 15 in the nation. For about 16 weeks of work (for the record, that's about half the number of weeks teachers work - on the clock.) Wow, big gap, isn't it? Yet, to figure out the budget, they are cutting money from necessary programs that are actually, well, necessary! Now, if I were to dig deeper, I'm sure money has been cut from the police and fire department budget, the transportation department and so on, but I don't really pay that much attention to that, so I stick with what I know, which is education.
You might say, yeah, but teachers have awesome benefits! (Excuse me, I actually just spit my drink on my monitor from laughing when I read what I just wrote...) No, not really. Our insurance isn't cheaper - in fact, I happen to know first hand that for the EXACT SAME insurance with the EXACT SAME benefits, employees of the state district attorneys insurance is HALF the cost of ours. So even within our own state jobs there is inequality. Days off? Believe it or not, we don't actually get paid for those - our salary is actually based on 185 days of work, over approximately 9 months (throw in Christmas break, Thanksgiving Break, Easter Break, Spring Break and Fall Break, then the normal holidays most people get like Labor Day and you come up with the 9 month time span), they just split our salary into 12 payments for us. You can argue that if we worked every day, our salary would be double. Yes, but we don't work at school every day, do we? Moot point... Easier hours? Really? Come with me and spend some of my "easier" hours with me. Physically easier, possibly yes. Mentally? Let's just say there's a reason so many teachers file nervous and mental claims with their insurance companies at the end of the year. It isn't because their brains are working in tip top fashion by the end of the school year!
Now, to be fair, let's look at legislator benefits...this is all according to the news article for 4-5 months work, btw.
The STARTING salary for a legislator in 2011 in Oklahoma is around $38,000.00. (That's more than I make a year, after 9 years of teaching.) Not to mention the BONUSES of $12,000.00 - $17,000.00 the leadership of the legislature get. (Bonuses? Really? For what? Dragging unnecessary bills through the committees and getting them passed? Voting themselves raises every year? Wow. We teachers here in Woodward got a bonus of $500.00 one year. Once. And none of us have a salary higher than the state step mandated to us, not counting stipends, military experience, etc.) Reading that article, there are actually states around us that their legislators get LESS than 10,000.00, and one that doesn't even have a salary!
This is just hearsay, but I'd LOVE to find out about it. Golden umbrella insurance, not paid by them but by us, the citizens of the state. And it covers not just them but their families. For the rest of their lives. My insurance was so expensive, I couldn't afford to put my own kids on it and this is with me taking the least expensive choice. Nice, huh?
Back to information from the article. Daily stipends of around $148.00. Daily, as in EVERY DAY. If they aren't staying in a place in the city that is probably paid by, yup, us! PLUS mileage! These two benefits are for those that live more than 50 miles away. 148 per day PLUS mileage? WOW! Just for 16 weeks, the stipend alone is over 9 thousand bucks per person. Add mileage on top of that, and you have one heck of a benefit plan there. (Let's see, we teachers in this district aren't allowed to take our own vehicles on required workshop trips anymore, thus saving our school, I think, around 60 cents a mile, but we do get our meals reimbursed so long as they aren't more than 20.00. We also aren't allowed to spend the night unless it's a multiple day workshop - we have to go down early that morning and come back that night.) Trust me, I'm not blaming our school at all. They're doing what they have to just to survive. I'm just comparing is all.
I'm sure there are more things I could rant about. These legislators seem to get the best of the best in Oklahoma. But, these very same legislators have decided the BEST place to cut money is from ESSENTIAL programs used by teachers, police, fire fighters, transportation people, doctors, etc. Yet, I don't see a single one of them saying, "We need to cut our truly excessive salary and benefit package - the people of Oklahoma are suffering! We found 6 million in Education by taking away a teacher's benefits and hurting our children by taking away their programs. We could have done that with our own salaries! It's not right we live in luxury while they are being threatened daily." Don't really see this happening, do you?
This was just from our state alone - can you imagine what it's like in Washington? No wonder people want to be politicians!
What's wrong with us people? We actually VOTED to put these people in office. When will America stop being apathetic and take back our country? Remember that part in the Declaration of Independence? We make our children memorize it at school...
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.
Key word: Consent. They have to have OUR permission, not the other way around.
I really hope it's the weather because, holy smokes, it's getting hot in Oklahoma!
However, when I read this today, I felt the blood begin to boil and felt a blog post coming on. I only HOPE that with this issue, it's just the weather!
Lately, I've been reading about the budget cuts being made, and all the programs being dropped just so states and the nation can do whatever it is that they need to. And while this is normal stuff and just part of an otherwise normal process, the American people are starting to notice.
A few weeks ago, it became clear that our State Superintendent, the woman in charge of all of education in Oklahoma, the one with the dental degree and not the highly qualified teaching degree the rest of us HAVE to have just to teach in the U.S., yet the state education Czar has no need for such a bothersome thing, decided to cut the stipends paid to nationally certified teachers. (see article here - http://okea.org/about-oea/media-center/state-department-delivers-fatal-blow-to-teacher-incentive-program.) The money that was promised to them and an actual effort to keep this state's teachers in Oklahoma and not go to Texas or Kansas where they actually pay their teachers, so long as they had it available (which they do have available, she just decided to use it elsewhere.) The worst thing about this is that she was the deciding vote - the tie breaker - in this decision. OUR OKLAHOMA EDUCATION LEADER decided to spit on those teachers who took the time to better themselves!
This was a big blow to those teachers because, despite being so good at their jobs, they need that money every bit as much as do the rest of us. They put in nearly 3 years of extremely difficult work and are now told, "So? Deal with it! We're in a budget crunch! Come on, make the sacrifice for your school and the children!" [insert slap in face here] Its great TEACHERS can sacrifice for children - we have for years and don't complain when doing so. How about someone else take a turn at sacrificing "for the children?" Like our State Superintendent and her staff, for starters? The National Board stipend was just a little recognition that these teachers duly deserve. They worked hard for it! (I'm in the middle of the process myself, though I'm questioning now if I should complete it. For some reason, it doesn't seem worth it now since I've gotten the educational benefit from it. Not for just 4 little letters after my name since there's no other benefit outside of personal growth anymore from it.)
Anyway, in a second strike, she got rid of funding for literacy programs that we teachers have used to help us reach the ridiculous goals these very same politicians/non educators have placed on us and our students. (Found here http://newsok.com/state-elementary-school-reading-program-unfunded-for-first-time-in-13-years/article/3585357#ixzz1S67LHQGb.) This is after all the hoopla she made when she first took office that made so many people want to impeach her, if that's even possible. All for a POSSIBLE savings of nearly 6 million dollars. Is that all? Seriously? Doesn't seem worth it in the big picture.
Now, today, I read that Obama has said that if Congress doesn't vote to allow the debt ceiling to be raised, he's can't guarantee that Social Security checks will be able to go out to the American People. (Found here http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/07/12/obama-social-security-checks-debt-ceiling_n_895831.html.)Seriously? The very people that put him and the legislators in office are being told they won't get paid? These people NEED their checks! Where is the legislator threat of not getting paid? These AMERICAN citizens don't get to live in a tax funded white house with security fences and have a cook making them and their families meals for them. They don't have chauffeurs, and actually have to pay the high cost for gasoline in the car they hope will make it through the day. They don't get the option of not worrying about their utility bills and if they paid them correctly this month. They have doctors bills to pay because they use the doctor and go to the hospital MORE than those in office. They don't have a salary greater than $250,000.00 a year, then $150,000.00 for the rest of their lives AFTER they leave office. Yet, the one person in the nation that gets all of this is telling them that their very lives are in danger because they can't find the money (outside of their own paychecks, that is).
People, we have to wake up! We HAVE to put a stop to the harassment our own, voted for, politicians are doing to us. We HAVE to stop being held for ransom!
Ok, now you're saying I'm being sensationalist. Maybe, but let's take a look at Oklahoma for now. Let's see. Teachers in Oklahoma have one of the LOWEST salaries for teachers in America. Like the bottom 5 is what I remember (I may be wrong, but I'm close.) It's documented, it's valid and everyone knows this. Yet, according to a news article (Found here http://www.newson6.com/story/15081983/tonight-at-10-oklahoma-lawmakers-among-best-paid-in-nation) I read yesterday, our legislators and leaders in this state have one of the HIGHEST salaries in America - somewhere in the TOP 15 in the nation. For about 16 weeks of work (for the record, that's about half the number of weeks teachers work - on the clock.) Wow, big gap, isn't it? Yet, to figure out the budget, they are cutting money from necessary programs that are actually, well, necessary! Now, if I were to dig deeper, I'm sure money has been cut from the police and fire department budget, the transportation department and so on, but I don't really pay that much attention to that, so I stick with what I know, which is education.
You might say, yeah, but teachers have awesome benefits! (Excuse me, I actually just spit my drink on my monitor from laughing when I read what I just wrote...) No, not really. Our insurance isn't cheaper - in fact, I happen to know first hand that for the EXACT SAME insurance with the EXACT SAME benefits, employees of the state district attorneys insurance is HALF the cost of ours. So even within our own state jobs there is inequality. Days off? Believe it or not, we don't actually get paid for those - our salary is actually based on 185 days of work, over approximately 9 months (throw in Christmas break, Thanksgiving Break, Easter Break, Spring Break and Fall Break, then the normal holidays most people get like Labor Day and you come up with the 9 month time span), they just split our salary into 12 payments for us. You can argue that if we worked every day, our salary would be double. Yes, but we don't work at school every day, do we? Moot point... Easier hours? Really? Come with me and spend some of my "easier" hours with me. Physically easier, possibly yes. Mentally? Let's just say there's a reason so many teachers file nervous and mental claims with their insurance companies at the end of the year. It isn't because their brains are working in tip top fashion by the end of the school year!
Now, to be fair, let's look at legislator benefits...this is all according to the news article for 4-5 months work, btw.
The STARTING salary for a legislator in 2011 in Oklahoma is around $38,000.00. (That's more than I make a year, after 9 years of teaching.) Not to mention the BONUSES of $12,000.00 - $17,000.00 the leadership of the legislature get. (Bonuses? Really? For what? Dragging unnecessary bills through the committees and getting them passed? Voting themselves raises every year? Wow. We teachers here in Woodward got a bonus of $500.00 one year. Once. And none of us have a salary higher than the state step mandated to us, not counting stipends, military experience, etc.) Reading that article, there are actually states around us that their legislators get LESS than 10,000.00, and one that doesn't even have a salary!
This is just hearsay, but I'd LOVE to find out about it. Golden umbrella insurance, not paid by them but by us, the citizens of the state. And it covers not just them but their families. For the rest of their lives. My insurance was so expensive, I couldn't afford to put my own kids on it and this is with me taking the least expensive choice. Nice, huh?
Back to information from the article. Daily stipends of around $148.00. Daily, as in EVERY DAY. If they aren't staying in a place in the city that is probably paid by, yup, us! PLUS mileage! These two benefits are for those that live more than 50 miles away. 148 per day PLUS mileage? WOW! Just for 16 weeks, the stipend alone is over 9 thousand bucks per person. Add mileage on top of that, and you have one heck of a benefit plan there. (Let's see, we teachers in this district aren't allowed to take our own vehicles on required workshop trips anymore, thus saving our school, I think, around 60 cents a mile, but we do get our meals reimbursed so long as they aren't more than 20.00. We also aren't allowed to spend the night unless it's a multiple day workshop - we have to go down early that morning and come back that night.) Trust me, I'm not blaming our school at all. They're doing what they have to just to survive. I'm just comparing is all.
I'm sure there are more things I could rant about. These legislators seem to get the best of the best in Oklahoma. But, these very same legislators have decided the BEST place to cut money is from ESSENTIAL programs used by teachers, police, fire fighters, transportation people, doctors, etc. Yet, I don't see a single one of them saying, "We need to cut our truly excessive salary and benefit package - the people of Oklahoma are suffering! We found 6 million in Education by taking away a teacher's benefits and hurting our children by taking away their programs. We could have done that with our own salaries! It's not right we live in luxury while they are being threatened daily." Don't really see this happening, do you?
This was just from our state alone - can you imagine what it's like in Washington? No wonder people want to be politicians!
What's wrong with us people? We actually VOTED to put these people in office. When will America stop being apathetic and take back our country? Remember that part in the Declaration of Independence? We make our children memorize it at school...
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.
Key word: Consent. They have to have OUR permission, not the other way around.
I really hope it's the weather because, holy smokes, it's getting hot in Oklahoma!
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Take Me Out to the Ballgame....
Recently, I've been reading the summer sporting "updates" on Facebook and various other social media, and I have to say I laugh when I do. Now, it's not just one post from one upset parent - seriously, it's been several posts by several parents and several days that I've seen them...so please don't think I'm singling anyone out in particular.
Oh, and by laugh, I mean it starts as a smirk, then a giggle, then an uncontrollable, maniacal laugh that makes my dogs wake up and slink off to their kennel to hide. You have to understand why, though. I remember those days when my daughters played summer ball - the days when I would rush home from work, and while still wearing my dress clothes, and in 5 minutes, get the kids dressed and run them to the field (usually late) in 100+ degree weather to watch them play t-ball or softball at a field with little to no shade, sweating like crazy and yelling at my girls to, "watch the ball hit the bat!" or encouraging them with a, "you can do it!" or scolding them to, "stand up and pay attention!" I also, much to my shame now, remember thinking (and sometimes voicing my opinion) that the person in charge was either "a good coach" or one that "only did it so their kids could play". Quite often it was, "What the hell is this person thinking?"
As a man who had played baseball my entire childhood all the way up through college, who knows the sport like the back of my hand, and who really, REALLY wanted his kids to enjoy sports as much as he did, it was difficult keeping quiet outside the fence. Thank goodness for my wife back then. She tended to keep me under control somewhat, and I knew if she was yelling then it was OK for me to yell, too. I just couldn't do more than she did, or I was in trouble. Thing is, I would choose to focus my attention on my kids and not really the coach, especially during practice, because, with a few exceptions, I figured I knew better than the coach did.
I know, I know - that sounds like I'm on a high horse and snooty and that I'm "all that". Yup, I guess so, but stop it. You did it, too! We all do, even coaches. We are human, we are competitive and we all want our kids to be successful. I know this because I see your posts about it! I could write a book about parents and their kids during sporting events (my dad was one of those) and I could probably include myself in it.
Let's face it. Some people just shouldn't be coaches. Some are just in it because they were roped in and no one else would do it. They don't really understand the game, and are just filling a spot. (Lord, help them!) Some think they know what they're doing even though it's obvious they don't. (These are the ones that teach the children incorrectly. We all know those. Lord help US!) However, I have to give it to the coaches who take the time every year to try and teach these young ones the game from the ground up. It's really not that easy...
To give you some background, I've had the distinct honor of being a parent to two wonderful, beautiful and talented daughters who played softball for Kid's Inc as long as they could. I think they could really have gone much further than they did, but in the interest of not shoving my goals for them (sports-wise) in their faces, we decided to let them play if they wanted, or not play. It was always their choice. It wasn't easy for them, though. Like I said, I grew up playing "the game" and was somewhat successful at it. That meant I was extra tough on them...Yikes, right? So when they didn't want to play, I may have coaxed them into it, or just dealt with it that summer.
Secondly, I've also had the distinct honor of being a coach and umpire for four years when I was younger. I coached, with my roommate back in college, a Little League baseball team for two years, then umpired baseball and softball for a community (not Woodward) for a summer, then coached 7th grade softball for a summer. Folks, I'm here to tell ya, it just ain't easy. Dealing with kids can be difficult, but sometimes, dealing with parents during a game is not much easier! In fact, during a coaches meeting my second year coaching, one of the old timers who'd been coaching for years, voiced, "The game would be easier, the kids would learn more and have more fun if we just wouldn't allow parents to show up!" I agree and here's why.
As a coach of summer league ball, you aren't just focused on one kid. These aren't the high school kids who already know the game. You have (hopefully) 9 or more kids to keep an eye on and to train properly. You have to deal with the shy kid, the mean kid, the smelly kid, the goofy kid and the one that doesn't get along with anyone but really tries to, and the one that is truly an athlete. You get the kids that have played forever and the ones that just today decided to play for the first time. Not only that, you have to give them ALL the best of your time. You have to find which position they'll truly be good at (not the one the parent thinks their kid needs to play) and you have to teach them how to play that position. You have to teach them to not be afraid of the ball, keep their eye on the ball and to close their mitt when the ball lands inside it. Then you have to teach them to bat properly, and depending on the age, which direction to run should they actually get a hit. Oh, and the fun thing is, during summer ball, you usually have about a two weeks (maybe 4-5 practices) to do all this in!
As a coach at this level, you have to separate your innate desire to win, win, win and teach the kid HOW to win, win, win while taking into consideration these aren't little adults we're dealing with. They want to have fun, fun, fun and trust me, when a kid wants to have fun, and is mixed in with a bunch of other kids that want to have fun - they're going to have fun one way or the other! You have to love kids and love the sport your coaching, or you'll burn out faster than a Wal-Mart brand light bulb.
The coach at this level not only does this, sees the entire team as a TEAM, but realizes they are a bunch of individuals at this point. They see who gets along with whom, they see who is having a good day or a bad day, they see the lazy ones who never show up to practice or just stand around, the ones with potential, the ones that are truly gifted. They know the criers, they know the haters, they know the ones that are poison to a team. And, they usually spend a good majority of their free time trying to put these kid in a position that will help the team be successful. IF they are lucky, they might be able to build up a team that will win.
Now, throw in the unknown variable. The parents. Each year I coached I wondered if I was going to get the parents who thought they knew more than me, that were the "experts" (like me, haha!) who grew up with the game. The yellers, or the ones that were quiet, but would "talk" to their friends about you. The ones that wanted their kid to do great - not necessarily the team. The ones that just KNEW their kid was going to be the pitcher or catcher and NEVER the right fielder. Or if I'd get lucky and get a bunch of vocally supportive parents. Believe it or not, for every one or two haters, there are 6-7 who think you're doing great - they just don't say it so you don't know it.
From my point of view as a parent and as a coach, it was easier to coach from your car than it was the bench. Almost all the stress in a game came from outside the fence, not inside it. What's more, the kids knew it, too. As an umpire, I saw many kids when their parents started to yell at me or the coaches. Their faces changed, they got embarrassed or sad. Their shoulders would slump and all enthusiasm would drain from them. They really stopped having fun. In fact, I'd lay dollars on the table that they wished they could do anything else than play that game at that moment. As an example, after one particularly rough umpiring gig of 8 and under softball girls, one of the girls came up to me and actually apologized for her dad and told me I was a good umpire and that I should just ignore him. How sad is that?
I do have to say, despite this blog sounding negative, coaching isn't unpleasant. It's work, but it's really a lot of fun! I had a lot of laughs while I was coaching. Also, I loved teaching the sport to the kids. I guess that showed, because I had a parent come up to me after the last game of the season the year I coached 7th grade girls softball and tell me that they loved how I would take the time to teach the girls right then how to do something when they struck out or dropped a ball or misplayed or whatever. Another couple of parents asked if I'd be willing to coach during the school year because they thought I was great at it! (I didn't tell them I only coached that season because I actually got "roped" into doing it, haha! I can't imagine going through what an actual coach for a school goes through.) We only won one game that season, but it was truly fun. I saw the girls grow a lot, including my youngest daughter, and I got to coach her last season of playing. Now THAT was worth it.
I guess my whole point is that as parents and coaches we all need to remember that the coaches during summer league are all voluntary and that they have taken a lot on their plate by accepting the position. It's quite an honor to be a coach - they are entrusted with our children and the knowledge of the game. We also have to remember WHY the kids are playing. Our time for playing is past, and yes, although we live vicariously through our children, we want our kids to be successful and it irritates us when we see what we think isn't right. We just need to remember that not all sides of the cube are showing at one time and there's a side (or two) that we just don't know about. Also, baseball, t-ball, softball, soccer, basketball, football - they're all just games. And games are supposed to be fun. Yes, be angry when we need to be because we're probably right, but also remember that our kids are watching us.
So, PLAY BALL and have a great time doing so!
Oh, and by laugh, I mean it starts as a smirk, then a giggle, then an uncontrollable, maniacal laugh that makes my dogs wake up and slink off to their kennel to hide. You have to understand why, though. I remember those days when my daughters played summer ball - the days when I would rush home from work, and while still wearing my dress clothes, and in 5 minutes, get the kids dressed and run them to the field (usually late) in 100+ degree weather to watch them play t-ball or softball at a field with little to no shade, sweating like crazy and yelling at my girls to, "watch the ball hit the bat!" or encouraging them with a, "you can do it!" or scolding them to, "stand up and pay attention!" I also, much to my shame now, remember thinking (and sometimes voicing my opinion) that the person in charge was either "a good coach" or one that "only did it so their kids could play". Quite often it was, "What the hell is this person thinking?"
As a man who had played baseball my entire childhood all the way up through college, who knows the sport like the back of my hand, and who really, REALLY wanted his kids to enjoy sports as much as he did, it was difficult keeping quiet outside the fence. Thank goodness for my wife back then. She tended to keep me under control somewhat, and I knew if she was yelling then it was OK for me to yell, too. I just couldn't do more than she did, or I was in trouble. Thing is, I would choose to focus my attention on my kids and not really the coach, especially during practice, because, with a few exceptions, I figured I knew better than the coach did.
I know, I know - that sounds like I'm on a high horse and snooty and that I'm "all that". Yup, I guess so, but stop it. You did it, too! We all do, even coaches. We are human, we are competitive and we all want our kids to be successful. I know this because I see your posts about it! I could write a book about parents and their kids during sporting events (my dad was one of those) and I could probably include myself in it.
Let's face it. Some people just shouldn't be coaches. Some are just in it because they were roped in and no one else would do it. They don't really understand the game, and are just filling a spot. (Lord, help them!) Some think they know what they're doing even though it's obvious they don't. (These are the ones that teach the children incorrectly. We all know those. Lord help US!) However, I have to give it to the coaches who take the time every year to try and teach these young ones the game from the ground up. It's really not that easy...
To give you some background, I've had the distinct honor of being a parent to two wonderful, beautiful and talented daughters who played softball for Kid's Inc as long as they could. I think they could really have gone much further than they did, but in the interest of not shoving my goals for them (sports-wise) in their faces, we decided to let them play if they wanted, or not play. It was always their choice. It wasn't easy for them, though. Like I said, I grew up playing "the game" and was somewhat successful at it. That meant I was extra tough on them...Yikes, right? So when they didn't want to play, I may have coaxed them into it, or just dealt with it that summer.
Secondly, I've also had the distinct honor of being a coach and umpire for four years when I was younger. I coached, with my roommate back in college, a Little League baseball team for two years, then umpired baseball and softball for a community (not Woodward) for a summer, then coached 7th grade softball for a summer. Folks, I'm here to tell ya, it just ain't easy. Dealing with kids can be difficult, but sometimes, dealing with parents during a game is not much easier! In fact, during a coaches meeting my second year coaching, one of the old timers who'd been coaching for years, voiced, "The game would be easier, the kids would learn more and have more fun if we just wouldn't allow parents to show up!" I agree and here's why.
As a coach of summer league ball, you aren't just focused on one kid. These aren't the high school kids who already know the game. You have (hopefully) 9 or more kids to keep an eye on and to train properly. You have to deal with the shy kid, the mean kid, the smelly kid, the goofy kid and the one that doesn't get along with anyone but really tries to, and the one that is truly an athlete. You get the kids that have played forever and the ones that just today decided to play for the first time. Not only that, you have to give them ALL the best of your time. You have to find which position they'll truly be good at (not the one the parent thinks their kid needs to play) and you have to teach them how to play that position. You have to teach them to not be afraid of the ball, keep their eye on the ball and to close their mitt when the ball lands inside it. Then you have to teach them to bat properly, and depending on the age, which direction to run should they actually get a hit. Oh, and the fun thing is, during summer ball, you usually have about a two weeks (maybe 4-5 practices) to do all this in!
As a coach at this level, you have to separate your innate desire to win, win, win and teach the kid HOW to win, win, win while taking into consideration these aren't little adults we're dealing with. They want to have fun, fun, fun and trust me, when a kid wants to have fun, and is mixed in with a bunch of other kids that want to have fun - they're going to have fun one way or the other! You have to love kids and love the sport your coaching, or you'll burn out faster than a Wal-Mart brand light bulb.
The coach at this level not only does this, sees the entire team as a TEAM, but realizes they are a bunch of individuals at this point. They see who gets along with whom, they see who is having a good day or a bad day, they see the lazy ones who never show up to practice or just stand around, the ones with potential, the ones that are truly gifted. They know the criers, they know the haters, they know the ones that are poison to a team. And, they usually spend a good majority of their free time trying to put these kid in a position that will help the team be successful. IF they are lucky, they might be able to build up a team that will win.
Now, throw in the unknown variable. The parents. Each year I coached I wondered if I was going to get the parents who thought they knew more than me, that were the "experts" (like me, haha!) who grew up with the game. The yellers, or the ones that were quiet, but would "talk" to their friends about you. The ones that wanted their kid to do great - not necessarily the team. The ones that just KNEW their kid was going to be the pitcher or catcher and NEVER the right fielder. Or if I'd get lucky and get a bunch of vocally supportive parents. Believe it or not, for every one or two haters, there are 6-7 who think you're doing great - they just don't say it so you don't know it.
From my point of view as a parent and as a coach, it was easier to coach from your car than it was the bench. Almost all the stress in a game came from outside the fence, not inside it. What's more, the kids knew it, too. As an umpire, I saw many kids when their parents started to yell at me or the coaches. Their faces changed, they got embarrassed or sad. Their shoulders would slump and all enthusiasm would drain from them. They really stopped having fun. In fact, I'd lay dollars on the table that they wished they could do anything else than play that game at that moment. As an example, after one particularly rough umpiring gig of 8 and under softball girls, one of the girls came up to me and actually apologized for her dad and told me I was a good umpire and that I should just ignore him. How sad is that?
I do have to say, despite this blog sounding negative, coaching isn't unpleasant. It's work, but it's really a lot of fun! I had a lot of laughs while I was coaching. Also, I loved teaching the sport to the kids. I guess that showed, because I had a parent come up to me after the last game of the season the year I coached 7th grade girls softball and tell me that they loved how I would take the time to teach the girls right then how to do something when they struck out or dropped a ball or misplayed or whatever. Another couple of parents asked if I'd be willing to coach during the school year because they thought I was great at it! (I didn't tell them I only coached that season because I actually got "roped" into doing it, haha! I can't imagine going through what an actual coach for a school goes through.) We only won one game that season, but it was truly fun. I saw the girls grow a lot, including my youngest daughter, and I got to coach her last season of playing. Now THAT was worth it.
I guess my whole point is that as parents and coaches we all need to remember that the coaches during summer league are all voluntary and that they have taken a lot on their plate by accepting the position. It's quite an honor to be a coach - they are entrusted with our children and the knowledge of the game. We also have to remember WHY the kids are playing. Our time for playing is past, and yes, although we live vicariously through our children, we want our kids to be successful and it irritates us when we see what we think isn't right. We just need to remember that not all sides of the cube are showing at one time and there's a side (or two) that we just don't know about. Also, baseball, t-ball, softball, soccer, basketball, football - they're all just games. And games are supposed to be fun. Yes, be angry when we need to be because we're probably right, but also remember that our kids are watching us.
So, PLAY BALL and have a great time doing so!
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Are we REALLY the "Friendliest Town in America"?
I don't know. I'm torn...I try to live by the mantra that character is what you show when you think no one is watching, so this question kind of befuddles me. Surely I'm not the only one!
Oh, and sorry for the length - I really need a blog. And I do promise I'm not being negative, I'm just asking this question to myself and wonder what others think.
Am I the only one that thinks Woodward spent more time trying to impress the Winn family and winning the Friendliest City in America award than it does actually trying to be a friendly city? Lately, I feel we'd be in the running for Fakest City in America for sure.
I look at what "Woodward" is doing currently and has been doing for the past few weeks, and what some people are saying in the news and on Facebook and wonder, "Where the heck is this Woodward you people are talking about? Why can't I see it?"
I mean, don't get me wrong, we definitely aren't bad by any stretch of the imagination, but I can EASILY list off 5 towns in this part of Oklahoma alone that are friendlier than Woodward is on a daily basis. Especially when getting growled at in businesses I frequent - or even worse, no reply to a thank you (a simple you're welcome would be nice), people driving like they don't care who's in front of them or behind them, trash in parking lots (btw, I loved the nasty diaper I slid my foot against accidentally in my flip flops yesterday at Wal-Mart - with a trashcan less than 20 yards away, so for that person who feels it's ok to drop a crappy diaper in a parking space, thank you! [end sarcasm] Yes, I know it might have just fallen out, but it's not uncommon to see a nasty diaper in the Wal-Mart parking lot.), the lack of common courtesy, people who you've known for years as acquaintances who won't even smile when they see you, and various things around town that need to be fixed up, but isn't being done (oh wait, they are NOW, after years of falling apart)... sigh, the list goes on.
Honestly, while I love the things Woodward has done to prepare for this and to celebrate being one of the "friendliest towns in America", I myself, as someone who has lived in Woodward more than half my life, would be MUCH more impressed if all these evening-time sales we've had at businesses that most usually cater to the unemployed (you can only shop there during the day - forget it if it's after 5:00), all these parties/get-togethers we've suddenly decided as a town we can afford and found reasons to have, all these smiling faces, the clean up/beautification, and simple celebrations were being done when there actually isn't a title on the line or something other than simple fellowship to gain.
Yes, it's fun. Yes, people are in a great mood because of it, and even more importantly, it's what's going on NOW in Woodward. BUT, to me it just seems like we're one of those old western town with all it's false faces towards Main Street, all just so we LOOK good to everyone else. What's wrong with carrying this over and being this way ALL the time? How about in September, February, April, or June, instead of just on the 4th of July or December for Chrystal Christmas, or when one of our high school sports teams goes to state (by the way, not taking anything away from our high school athletes at all, but where are the celebrations for our other high school groups that go to state and have actually won? Where is THEIR celebration? Sigh, I guess that's a different rant for a different time.) I guess I'm just asking, why can't we be this way ALL the time?
Or, what if this is a wake up call for Woodward? We need to actually BE friendly on regular days and not only on "special" occasions or holidays and actually earn this title, not just put on a face to win a contest. We have it in us to be that town. I've seen it, you've seen and it feels good. So, will we actually take it and deserve the reward? Or will we just wait to do it all again whenever the next big thing comes along?
Oh, and sorry for the length - I really need a blog. And I do promise I'm not being negative, I'm just asking this question to myself and wonder what others think.
Am I the only one that thinks Woodward spent more time trying to impress the Winn family and winning the Friendliest City in America award than it does actually trying to be a friendly city? Lately, I feel we'd be in the running for Fakest City in America for sure.
I look at what "Woodward" is doing currently and has been doing for the past few weeks, and what some people are saying in the news and on Facebook and wonder, "Where the heck is this Woodward you people are talking about? Why can't I see it?"
I mean, don't get me wrong, we definitely aren't bad by any stretch of the imagination, but I can EASILY list off 5 towns in this part of Oklahoma alone that are friendlier than Woodward is on a daily basis. Especially when getting growled at in businesses I frequent - or even worse, no reply to a thank you (a simple you're welcome would be nice), people driving like they don't care who's in front of them or behind them, trash in parking lots (btw, I loved the nasty diaper I slid my foot against accidentally in my flip flops yesterday at Wal-Mart - with a trashcan less than 20 yards away, so for that person who feels it's ok to drop a crappy diaper in a parking space, thank you! [end sarcasm] Yes, I know it might have just fallen out, but it's not uncommon to see a nasty diaper in the Wal-Mart parking lot.), the lack of common courtesy, people who you've known for years as acquaintances who won't even smile when they see you, and various things around town that need to be fixed up, but isn't being done (oh wait, they are NOW, after years of falling apart)... sigh, the list goes on.
Honestly, while I love the things Woodward has done to prepare for this and to celebrate being one of the "friendliest towns in America", I myself, as someone who has lived in Woodward more than half my life, would be MUCH more impressed if all these evening-time sales we've had at businesses that most usually cater to the unemployed (you can only shop there during the day - forget it if it's after 5:00), all these parties/get-togethers we've suddenly decided as a town we can afford and found reasons to have, all these smiling faces, the clean up/beautification, and simple celebrations were being done when there actually isn't a title on the line or something other than simple fellowship to gain.
Yes, it's fun. Yes, people are in a great mood because of it, and even more importantly, it's what's going on NOW in Woodward. BUT, to me it just seems like we're one of those old western town with all it's false faces towards Main Street, all just so we LOOK good to everyone else. What's wrong with carrying this over and being this way ALL the time? How about in September, February, April, or June, instead of just on the 4th of July or December for Chrystal Christmas, or when one of our high school sports teams goes to state (by the way, not taking anything away from our high school athletes at all, but where are the celebrations for our other high school groups that go to state and have actually won? Where is THEIR celebration? Sigh, I guess that's a different rant for a different time.) I guess I'm just asking, why can't we be this way ALL the time?
Or, what if this is a wake up call for Woodward? We need to actually BE friendly on regular days and not only on "special" occasions or holidays and actually earn this title, not just put on a face to win a contest. We have it in us to be that town. I've seen it, you've seen and it feels good. So, will we actually take it and deserve the reward? Or will we just wait to do it all again whenever the next big thing comes along?
What the heck am I doing this for?
A blog? Seriously? You're 45 years old and you want to put your thoughts and opinions out where people can, gasp, comment and give THEIR opinions on YOUR opinions? Are you CRAZY? Hasn't the last 20 years taught you anything?
Yeah, I think I am crazy. But, I do this because I want to write. I've got stuff stored in my head that needs to get out because it's taking up too much space. I've been a writer since college, where I wrote absolutely horrifying music and concert reviews with a partner who knew less than me, I think, about music. (But she was dang good looking! Oh, to have the priorities of a young man again...) Oh, and I started but never finished something like 10-12 "novels" during that time as well. I spent hours working on those things - which, by the way, I found the other day and I spent several minutes horrified by what I thought would be the next greatest thing written back in the day...
Following up with my writing "experience", I worked as a reporter and editor for the local newspaper, have taken writing classes, and even have taught writing to 5th graders for 8 years before becoming a 2nd grade teacher where we write sentences and short paragraphs, lol. All this, and I'm still just a mediocre writer, haha! So watch out! Here comes some of the most bland writing you have EVER read!
Anyways, so after writing yet another rather lengthy "note" on Facebook, I noticed that more and more of my facebook postings were turning into "Notes" instead of "Updates". I also noticed no one commented on them, haha! I figured that I needed to find another venue for my "rants". I also realized several of my friends were starting this "blog" trend. I figured that instead of just writing those there and boring people to tears, I'd come here and bore a whole NEW set of people to tears!
Honestly, I have no direction with this thing. I have no idea what I'm gonna do with it. I don't even know how often I'll write in it. Being as I'm "older", most will probably sound like rants or negativity. Just go with it - I'm old! A befuddled, yet somewhat amusing and handsome old, but still old. Ish.
So, here goes. And by the way, if any of you publishers out there that just MIGHT be reading blogs like this - I have a few ideas for novels sitting in my desk - give me a call! We can do lunch at the Pollyanna. You'll LOVE it!
Yeah, I think I am crazy. But, I do this because I want to write. I've got stuff stored in my head that needs to get out because it's taking up too much space. I've been a writer since college, where I wrote absolutely horrifying music and concert reviews with a partner who knew less than me, I think, about music. (But she was dang good looking! Oh, to have the priorities of a young man again...) Oh, and I started but never finished something like 10-12 "novels" during that time as well. I spent hours working on those things - which, by the way, I found the other day and I spent several minutes horrified by what I thought would be the next greatest thing written back in the day...
Following up with my writing "experience", I worked as a reporter and editor for the local newspaper, have taken writing classes, and even have taught writing to 5th graders for 8 years before becoming a 2nd grade teacher where we write sentences and short paragraphs, lol. All this, and I'm still just a mediocre writer, haha! So watch out! Here comes some of the most bland writing you have EVER read!
Anyways, so after writing yet another rather lengthy "note" on Facebook, I noticed that more and more of my facebook postings were turning into "Notes" instead of "Updates". I also noticed no one commented on them, haha! I figured that I needed to find another venue for my "rants". I also realized several of my friends were starting this "blog" trend. I figured that instead of just writing those there and boring people to tears, I'd come here and bore a whole NEW set of people to tears!
Honestly, I have no direction with this thing. I have no idea what I'm gonna do with it. I don't even know how often I'll write in it. Being as I'm "older", most will probably sound like rants or negativity. Just go with it - I'm old! A befuddled, yet somewhat amusing and handsome old, but still old. Ish.
So, here goes. And by the way, if any of you publishers out there that just MIGHT be reading blogs like this - I have a few ideas for novels sitting in my desk - give me a call! We can do lunch at the Pollyanna. You'll LOVE it!
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